The times they are a changing... that's the theme in our house lately.
Candy, Candy, Candy I can't let you go. Since Halloween, we have been swimming in candy. I find every year that my sweet tooth is a black hole and I could eat it all day long. I have passed this trait along to my children and the only one in the house that eats fruit more than fruit flavored candy...is Scott.
So my new tactic: they can eat what they want and tonight, 3 days later, we took out a sandwich sized ziploc and said they could keep whatever they could fit in the bag and zip closed. I quickly threw the rest of the candy in the garbage can and we took it outside so I wouldn't cave to pressure. It calls me, it constantly calls me.
Here's a few other things that we have tweaked in our family:
-In school: if you have any missing assignments, your electronic play time (wii, ipod) is to be used to make up the assignment. If the assignment is still missing by the weekend, the electronics are missing that weekend as well.
-We pay for grades as early as 6th grade. The money goes right into their savings for mission/college. If they have any money to add to their savings from their own pocket, we will double the amount. Grades before 6th grade are rewarded as well, special night out or new book or toy.
-Night out: every Monday is Dad's night out. After our Family night, Scott trades off kids to take them out for a little treat. It's been a time they all look forward to.
-Every Sunday, we have been doing "family council" this is a time when we quickly go over the calendar. Then, we discuss a solution to a problem that has come up. Recently we have discussed: Cell phones for kids, how to split the cost of the new WiiU (how much do the kids contribute, and what mom and dad will pay), discontinuing the cable TV with tons of channels, allowance and extra money job questions, family goals, or whatever has been the arguement of choice that week. It's nice because we can discuss it as a family and everyone's voice is important. After listening, we talk about a solution and work through it together.
-At home, if you don't use manners at the table (toot, burp, etc.) then you are asking to do the dinner dishes. This has direct impact and has reduced the amount of giggles at the table from this stuff.
-Work/chores: For years we have divided up the main areas of the house and bathrooms into a job list. The big job day here is Saturday, we don't worry about it much during the week except for the dish day or cook day. On Saturdays, they have to complete their jobs by 9 am to get electronics for the day. In addition to their bedrooms and folding their laundry, the rest of the house is divided. The master bathroom and loft, downstairs and guest bathroom, family room and sweeping the stairs.
We are still working on refining the process of raising a family. Now that we have a teen, a pre-teen, and a pre-pre-pre teen, we have found that our family rules need a little tweaking. Hopefully our efforts will one day pay off and they will be responsible, independent and giving people who love their mom and dad.